Isn`t that sad when you look back and can`t remember anything that you did extraordinarily well?
Isn`t that pathetic when you know that you can be brave and make a change to your life while you just played safe and did nothing?
Isn`t that miserable living a life like a walking dead? Which exactly what I am doing now!
I know much more than I think I know. I can do much more than I think I am capable of doing. But out of fucking fear, I, still am standing still. And I fucking hate that!
Why the hell a sense of self-importance is important to each individual, or at least to me?
Because, it can deliver a sense of constant excitement to your brain to make you focus on or dedicated to your work or the thing you do more than ever. It is a source of motivation, a driven energy, drives you closer toward your goals and dreams.
Did you ever feel excited or very satisfied with the compliment from your boss or your colleagues? What do you think you really get from that compliment? Isn`t that the feeling of being appreciated, being valued, the feeling that you know you are important to them? So you should ask, what is wrong with it?
Normally, there is nothing wrong with it except that your sense of importance comes from other people but not from you! you are building your self-worthiness based on others` opinions, but not yours. Simply put, you are dependent on others.
The worst thing about dependency is you are fragile, vulnerable, emotionally controlled by others` weakness. Trust me, as long as you are dependent, you are weak!
People wouldn`t care what kind of life you want or what kind of future you are planning for yourself. No one gives a shit about what you will become and who you will be. So, don`t expect to get the feeling of self-importance from other individuals, that`s pathetic. Evaluate your own importance yourself and tell yourself that you are indispensible. And start act like one, and don`t give a shit about what people think. Do this often, can help you build your self-confidence!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Predicament
Did you ever see a dress look terrific on the model, thought it would be terrific on you and bought it without trying it on?
I did. Many times. And it looks awful on me. I regret it every single time for every single dress I bought without actually knowing whether it fits me!
I did that again, it is not dress this time, but a job, a task comes with responsibility. It is not that I am inadequate for the job, but that it is a time-consuming job. It is always urgent but not important, trivial matters only, you barely can learn things from it. Simply put, not beneficial, not to me at least.
In a very large percent of time in our lives, we are dealing with urgent but not important matters. Like a ringing phone, an unanswered doorbell. These are not important, but urgent, they keep bugging you til you answer them. It is the same with the job I am taking. You have to be there to respond to it whenever, wherever.
The problem with me is that I like to separate my personal life from work. Once I am off work, I am done with work. I don`t want to be bothered, be involved in anything. At least not now, not at night during my off work hours.
But the problem with this job is that it invades my private time, forces me to give up part of my personal life. I would be like a on-call doctor. I have to be dedicated to this fucking thing unconditionally.
Everything is a tradeoff! The positive side of this job is it can promise you a fulfilling life which is be busy all the time. Some people like that, I do too. Keep busy like a bee can stop you from feeling fucking emptiness or nothingness of your life, which is a good thing because some people don`t know what they should do if they stop working and afraid to lose the purposes of life which they misperceive it as work and which they have lost long time ago.
I don`t want to be one of them. Since I am young, I am capable and willing, I would like to do something good, something extraordinary, something amazing. So to me, time is everything, time is life. That`s why I don`t want to give up my time for a job that can`t get me nothing, take me nowhere!
Having said all these, still, I haven`t decided yet! So, please, call me a coward!
I did. Many times. And it looks awful on me. I regret it every single time for every single dress I bought without actually knowing whether it fits me!
I did that again, it is not dress this time, but a job, a task comes with responsibility. It is not that I am inadequate for the job, but that it is a time-consuming job. It is always urgent but not important, trivial matters only, you barely can learn things from it. Simply put, not beneficial, not to me at least.
In a very large percent of time in our lives, we are dealing with urgent but not important matters. Like a ringing phone, an unanswered doorbell. These are not important, but urgent, they keep bugging you til you answer them. It is the same with the job I am taking. You have to be there to respond to it whenever, wherever.
The problem with me is that I like to separate my personal life from work. Once I am off work, I am done with work. I don`t want to be bothered, be involved in anything. At least not now, not at night during my off work hours.
But the problem with this job is that it invades my private time, forces me to give up part of my personal life. I would be like a on-call doctor. I have to be dedicated to this fucking thing unconditionally.
Everything is a tradeoff! The positive side of this job is it can promise you a fulfilling life which is be busy all the time. Some people like that, I do too. Keep busy like a bee can stop you from feeling fucking emptiness or nothingness of your life, which is a good thing because some people don`t know what they should do if they stop working and afraid to lose the purposes of life which they misperceive it as work and which they have lost long time ago.
I don`t want to be one of them. Since I am young, I am capable and willing, I would like to do something good, something extraordinary, something amazing. So to me, time is everything, time is life. That`s why I don`t want to give up my time for a job that can`t get me nothing, take me nowhere!
Having said all these, still, I haven`t decided yet! So, please, call me a coward!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Anti 'the disease of self-improvement'
http://www.mindpowernews.com/SelfImprovementDisease.htm
A friend of mine gives me this link and it is an article about 'the disease of self-improvement'.
And the below is my response to it, hope you enjoy!
Quote: ---Have you purchased self-improvement programs or read self-improvement books that you thought were going to change your life – but nothing really changed after your purchased them? You are not alone---.
Seriously? There are two main reasons why those programs or books fail to bring any change to your life:
1)Not the right and good book or time-worthy program.
2)You never really understand those philosophy introduced in those books or programs and even if you do, you are not applying those in your daily life.
So what is self-improvement?
Self-improvement is the actions that you will take when you feel deficient or incompetent at some fields like at doing something or at some perspectives like a state of mind.
We choose to take actions, we choose to do something about ourselves because we feel and we know that we can do better and be a better me. It is an awareness, is a self-evaluation. It is a way of knowing yourself, a way of learning yourself and exploring yourself.
Quote: ---The Disease of Self Improvement is the false notion that somehow we are "deficient" and in order to be happy and successful we have to "improve" ourselves. The very act of trying to improve ourselves causes us to believe that there is something wrong with us in the first place---
What? False notion? Who are you kidding. We as human, are deficient at many things. Like I don`t know how to drive a car. So I need to join a training course to learn how to drive it. Otherwise I will never master the skill of driving a car. My point is we are really deficient at different things and unless we go into the corresponding courses to learn and improve our skills, we will never be able to do it correctly.
Another example of why we need to self-improve. Suppose you are a shy guy who never really give a presentation before a thousand of people. You are stressed and nervous, don`t know how to do it right and successfully. So what you should do is to improve your ability to present yourself in front of people. How are you going to do that? Read a book about how to give presentation and practice the skills mentioned in the book. You might learn how to organize your context, how to interact with audiences, how to warm up the atmosphere before the presentation and how to deliver your points clearly and concisely. It is self-improvement, it is knowledge that you can learn from a self-improvement book.
We choose to improve ourselves not because we think there is something wrong with us, but we know from inside that there is something we should learn to do a better job, be a better me.
Quote: ---The only thing "wrong" is your beliefs ABOUT yourself and about the way life works---
The funny thing is that we create our beliefs and control our beliefs, not the opposite. So if there is anything wrong with the beliefs that I am holding on, then there must be something wrong with me.
It is the same with life. We are the one who is leading the life, but not the life leading us. So, if there is anything wrong with the way life works, there must be something wrong with me leading a life like that.
Quote: ---So how do you begin to live your life without the need for "self improvement"? First, begin by understanding that you already have everything you need to be happy and successful.---
That`s easy. Be a dummy, live a numb life. I am sure a person with IQ of 60 don`t know such thing as 'self-improvement'. Therefore he definitely has no such kind of need either.
You have everything you need? Who are you fooling? Yourself? Yeah, you can do that. Be happy with what you have. don`t have to suffer from the feeling of self-deficiency and self-insecure. Like no pain, which in turn will no gain either.
We feel we need self-improvement because we have the desire to be superior than others, to be more competent and powerful than others. Have the urge to be heard, to be known and to be respected and valued. To get the satisfaction of importance, to be adored and even to be memorized.
It is a choice that you make for your life and a life that you choose to pursue, to live. And it is personal.
Quote: ---Because it is so deeply embedded into your psyche that you don’t even know it is there, or where to find it, you seek out self-improvement material to help you find what you ALREADY have.---
It is really annoying to hear a lie like you already have it all.
Really? You have the height to play basketball doesn`t mean you are qualified for it. It is the skill that counts but not only the physical condition. Unless you are telling me that all those NBA players know how to play basketball since they were born.
It is the teaching, learning process that matters. It is the way how it comes to your awareness that matters. Then how can we make those things that matter happen to us? This is exactly where the self-improvement comes into play.
Quote: ---Why You Have to Think for Yourself---
this is reasonable and agreeable. Good point.
Quote: ---When you think about and talk about things that are in harmony with your desires, instead of thinking about what is wrong with you and the rest of the world, you will no longer be a victim of the Disease of Self Improvement. ---
It is where you should learn to differentiate the situations of self-improvement and self-denial. For your information, there are other states of mind as well and the state that you are promoting is called self-satisfaction. All you are saying is fill your mind with what you want and forget the rest. If you live only one day or two like that, I have no problem. But if you want to live your whole life like that, you are doomed. It is a classic act of self-deceiving.
This Dr. really know how to fill your mind with shit.
Quote: ---But you have to experience it from the inside out – not the outside in. ---
this is the sentence that I like most or I found most useful. However, it is imposed with twisted views. What a pity.
Quote: ---If you live your life from the outside in you will be controlled by your mind. ---
If we are not supposed to be controlled by our minds, then what are we supposed to be controlled by? Are we going to be surrogates and let`s the surrogates be us and control our minds? (the opposite scenario of 'Surrogate' by Bruce Willis') Do explain Dr.
Quote: ---Once you understand how to cooperate with the principles of quantum physics and the Law of Attraction, you will finally break out of the Self-Improvement trap for the rest of your life. ---
The masquerade of 'nothing'. Really nothing in it.
Quote: ---I do not teach self-improvement. Instead I teach people how to cure themselves from the Disease of Self improvement by creating their lives by design.---
Hmm, let`s say you have a disease of self-improvement and you don`t know it is a disease. After attending this Dr.`s session, you come to aware that you do have this disease. From not knowing to knowing, I would say it is an improvement and it is an improvement of you, you probably would call it self-improvement. Oh God, this Dr. just gives you a self-improvement lesson and he is affirmative that he don`t teach self-improvement.
I am lost here. Thank you Doc, let me confused more!
A friend of mine gives me this link and it is an article about 'the disease of self-improvement'.
And the below is my response to it, hope you enjoy!
Quote: ---Have you purchased self-improvement programs or read self-improvement books that you thought were going to change your life – but nothing really changed after your purchased them? You are not alone---.
Seriously? There are two main reasons why those programs or books fail to bring any change to your life:
1)Not the right and good book or time-worthy program.
2)You never really understand those philosophy introduced in those books or programs and even if you do, you are not applying those in your daily life.
So what is self-improvement?
Self-improvement is the actions that you will take when you feel deficient or incompetent at some fields like at doing something or at some perspectives like a state of mind.
We choose to take actions, we choose to do something about ourselves because we feel and we know that we can do better and be a better me. It is an awareness, is a self-evaluation. It is a way of knowing yourself, a way of learning yourself and exploring yourself.
Quote: ---The Disease of Self Improvement is the false notion that somehow we are "deficient" and in order to be happy and successful we have to "improve" ourselves. The very act of trying to improve ourselves causes us to believe that there is something wrong with us in the first place---
What? False notion? Who are you kidding. We as human, are deficient at many things. Like I don`t know how to drive a car. So I need to join a training course to learn how to drive it. Otherwise I will never master the skill of driving a car. My point is we are really deficient at different things and unless we go into the corresponding courses to learn and improve our skills, we will never be able to do it correctly.
Another example of why we need to self-improve. Suppose you are a shy guy who never really give a presentation before a thousand of people. You are stressed and nervous, don`t know how to do it right and successfully. So what you should do is to improve your ability to present yourself in front of people. How are you going to do that? Read a book about how to give presentation and practice the skills mentioned in the book. You might learn how to organize your context, how to interact with audiences, how to warm up the atmosphere before the presentation and how to deliver your points clearly and concisely. It is self-improvement, it is knowledge that you can learn from a self-improvement book.
We choose to improve ourselves not because we think there is something wrong with us, but we know from inside that there is something we should learn to do a better job, be a better me.
Quote: ---The only thing "wrong" is your beliefs ABOUT yourself and about the way life works---
The funny thing is that we create our beliefs and control our beliefs, not the opposite. So if there is anything wrong with the beliefs that I am holding on, then there must be something wrong with me.
It is the same with life. We are the one who is leading the life, but not the life leading us. So, if there is anything wrong with the way life works, there must be something wrong with me leading a life like that.
Quote: ---So how do you begin to live your life without the need for "self improvement"? First, begin by understanding that you already have everything you need to be happy and successful.---
That`s easy. Be a dummy, live a numb life. I am sure a person with IQ of 60 don`t know such thing as 'self-improvement'. Therefore he definitely has no such kind of need either.
You have everything you need? Who are you fooling? Yourself? Yeah, you can do that. Be happy with what you have. don`t have to suffer from the feeling of self-deficiency and self-insecure. Like no pain, which in turn will no gain either.
We feel we need self-improvement because we have the desire to be superior than others, to be more competent and powerful than others. Have the urge to be heard, to be known and to be respected and valued. To get the satisfaction of importance, to be adored and even to be memorized.
It is a choice that you make for your life and a life that you choose to pursue, to live. And it is personal.
Quote: ---Because it is so deeply embedded into your psyche that you don’t even know it is there, or where to find it, you seek out self-improvement material to help you find what you ALREADY have.---
It is really annoying to hear a lie like you already have it all.
Really? You have the height to play basketball doesn`t mean you are qualified for it. It is the skill that counts but not only the physical condition. Unless you are telling me that all those NBA players know how to play basketball since they were born.
It is the teaching, learning process that matters. It is the way how it comes to your awareness that matters. Then how can we make those things that matter happen to us? This is exactly where the self-improvement comes into play.
Quote: ---Why You Have to Think for Yourself---
this is reasonable and agreeable. Good point.
Quote: ---When you think about and talk about things that are in harmony with your desires, instead of thinking about what is wrong with you and the rest of the world, you will no longer be a victim of the Disease of Self Improvement. ---
It is where you should learn to differentiate the situations of self-improvement and self-denial. For your information, there are other states of mind as well and the state that you are promoting is called self-satisfaction. All you are saying is fill your mind with what you want and forget the rest. If you live only one day or two like that, I have no problem. But if you want to live your whole life like that, you are doomed. It is a classic act of self-deceiving.
This Dr. really know how to fill your mind with shit.
Quote: ---But you have to experience it from the inside out – not the outside in. ---
this is the sentence that I like most or I found most useful. However, it is imposed with twisted views. What a pity.
Quote: ---If you live your life from the outside in you will be controlled by your mind. ---
If we are not supposed to be controlled by our minds, then what are we supposed to be controlled by? Are we going to be surrogates and let`s the surrogates be us and control our minds? (the opposite scenario of 'Surrogate' by Bruce Willis') Do explain Dr.
Quote: ---Once you understand how to cooperate with the principles of quantum physics and the Law of Attraction, you will finally break out of the Self-Improvement trap for the rest of your life. ---
The masquerade of 'nothing'. Really nothing in it.
Quote: ---I do not teach self-improvement. Instead I teach people how to cure themselves from the Disease of Self improvement by creating their lives by design.---
Hmm, let`s say you have a disease of self-improvement and you don`t know it is a disease. After attending this Dr.`s session, you come to aware that you do have this disease. From not knowing to knowing, I would say it is an improvement and it is an improvement of you, you probably would call it self-improvement. Oh God, this Dr. just gives you a self-improvement lesson and he is affirmative that he don`t teach self-improvement.
I am lost here. Thank you Doc, let me confused more!
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